Ah! Wonderful!!! seems like its coming from one of those classic novels!! 😉
“Write a short letter to yourself, to be read one year from now. You don’t have to post the entire letter, but you do have to a) write it b) post about what surprised you the most about what you wrote, or whether you found the experience interesting or not.”
And what a wonderful day to begin writing such a letter!! I know exactly where I was and what state I was in, on this date last year!! and it would certainly feel great to read about my thoughts and feelings that I am often absorbed in, “to be read one year from now”.. Since I miss the exact feeling I had last year when I took the leap of faith. I had put myself in the shoes of a saint. I had decided to taste the fruits of forgiveness. July 19th, 2010. I had forgiven all my friends who had ridiculed me, misjudged me, taken my good intentions as ill and had left me in the lurch. An actual forgiveness. I flushed out feelings of anger and bitterness I had towards them. I had nothing in my heart against them. And this day I had taken a step to forgive and forget about what had happened and embrace them. The effect that it had on me was immense. It felt like a huge burden had been lifted from my soul. I felt free. I felt loved. I felt brand new! I no longer wanted to take revenge or do what they did to me. I left it all to be judged by God. And I was happy.
But one year On!! Unfortunately I am in the same position. (Surprising isn’t it?) Seeing them do the worst to me than I could ever imagine! Seriously! And this time I really hate myself for being patient and let them do what they did in the first place. I am still trying to recover. Trying to forget. Trying to give them another chance when I know they would never understand my point of view or even care about how wrong they were in what they did! I want to feel the peace, the serenity that I felt last year. When I had the power to love them and embrace them again. May be its because of what happened even after I forgave them that I feel insecure and believe that its totally futile to give them another chance. But as the Bible states;
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
(Matthew 18: 21-22)
I think I should really forgive and forget, unlike others but as far as I am concerned and the inner peace that I attained, for my God, and His best attribute of forgiveness. I forgive them yet again. And forget all of them. Even when we all are not together anymore or when their words still hurt my soul like thunder. I put a firm hand on my heart and forgive them.
As Gandhi said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
Pray for me and for my friends to embrace the virtue of forgiveness.